Sorry it’s been a good while since I’ve updated….mom life has taken it’s toll on me.
Work, household duties and raising a little human are definitely not the easiest thing I’ve undertaken, but I love it!
We’ve finally gotten into a good routine, but the past week or so Little Bear has been cranky. She is in full blown teething mode, and has had some slight medical issues that we’ve gotten under control. But, overall she’s a happy, healthy almost FIVE month old!
Update on mommy…well….she’s struggling guys. I have a lot of mom-guilt for leaving her still, especially with her getting so big and changing so much every single day. I’m also struggling with knowing that yes, I’m enough and yes, I’m doing the best that I can….and I’m doing the best for her…especially when people think my decisions are wrong.
That’s been the hardest thing for me to cope with: judgement for my decisions. I’ve decided to follow my own Mommy Gut and do what’s best for my child(ren)…so let me break down what apparently I’m doing completely wrong:
- She’s fully vaccinated – no delayed schedule.
- Tylenol given after vaccines for fever.
- She is just now tasting baby foods – mainly apple sauce and sweet potatoes, no others until 6+ months (i.e. Open/Virgin Gut, gastrointestinal issues on her dad’s side)
- Rice Cereal in her night bottle (for acid reflux, not to make her sleep)
- Sleeps in her own bed, in her own room (since 1 month old)
- Essential oils/Amber teething necklaces used for teething pain/tummy troubles
- NOT using hold remedies on my child (i.e. whiskey for teething, CIO method, force-feeding her before she’s ready)
- No pierced ears until she asks for it
- Will be rear-faced until by-laws deem her big/old enough
I catch hell about everything I’m doing for my child. It’s not “what we/they/I did with our/their/my kids”. Well good for you, Susie Q…this ain’t your child.
My child is just that…MINE. She is MY responsibility to take care of and raise, and I’m doing it how I see fit. Medical Research has proven that *GASP* not everything is the same as it was 50 years ago, or even 5 years ago. Just because someone did it with their kids, doesn’t mean I’m ok with it or need to do it with my child. Here’s an example of EVERY. SINGLE. CONVERSATION. i have lately.
“You need to be feeding that baby table food!” – Negative, ghostrider. She’s not old enough, and her dad’s family has a history of severe stomach issues. Not chancing it til she’s DEFINITELY old enough.
“Well MY child was eating table food at X date” – good for you. Weren’t you just telling me he/she has tummy issues, and now refuses to eat anything else but junk?
“You should bring her to see us, we’ll just turn on the air conditioner and smoke outside while she’s here…” – Nope, you smoke all in the house and we have a child who was in the NICU with lung issues. No thanks…
“But we smoked around our kids and they’re fine!” – um…NO.
“Give her x-thing to chew on” – how about you stop putting gross stuff in my kids mouth?
And the thing that ticks me off more than anything…..My child fussing and starting to cry, because she doesn’t want whoever is holding her at that point and looking at me reaching for her mother…
“Oh you’re fine, that mean ole mama doesn’t want you…” or “You don’t need that mean ole mama!”
First off….don’t EVER tell my child I don’t want her. Secondly, don’t ever tell my child she doesn’t NEED her mother. I took my child away from the person that last said that to me because I’d had enough. This is MY baby, and if she wants her mother, she can have her. I’ll hold her all day long to keep someone she doesn’t want to be with from holding her. Right now, I am her safe place. I am her person. She gets sick? She wants mama. She’s sleepy? Mama to the rescue. She doesn’t need anyone else, and that’s fine with me.
People…I’ve learned a lesson through my pregnancy and the last 4.5 months: DON’T LET ANYONE RUN YOU OVER.
I fought for PRIVACY during my pregnancy. I fought for the simple fact that no, not everyone needed to be involved in my pregnancy.
No, you don’t need to come to a prenatal appointment where they do internal ultrasounds and check my cervix.
No, you’re not going to be invited to the delivery room….get over it.
No, you DON’T need to be there at 5am when I’m being induced…go HOME!
No, you’re not coming to my house every day during my very short postpartum/maternity leave period.
No, you’re not going to smoke around my child/No, she’s not coming to the house you smoke inside.
No, you’re not doing X with my child…stop asking.
Clearly, I learned to say NO alot….and guess what? That’s perfectly ok.
It’s ok to NOT let people run you over.
It’s ok to shut down entitlement.
It’s ok to say NO, we’re not doing that with the baby.
It’s ok to let people know that YOU carried that child for nine long months, you PUSHED THAT CHILD OUT OF YOUR BODY, and you are in charge of their life from here on out. YOU are the parent, and that’s apparently very hard for some people to grasp, well….at least that’s been my experience thus far.
I say all this to say….well…to vent a bit…but to also encourage every mama to not back down from someone stepping on your toes. To be confident in the fact that you control what happens with your children, and people can either like it, or not be in your child’s life. We don’t have to break our backs in the name of “respect”. No, if they can’t respect us as the mother’s of our children, why would we want our child around that person? And even if you’re the only one who can see it, don’t back down. Stand up for yourself and your babies. They learn by watching our example!
Think about it. Don’t be a doormat.
Now, since all that is out of my system (Clearly I have some pent up anger over this….) How about an update on kiddo?
4.5 Month Update
- Weight: 15 lbs
- Length: 30inches
- Clothing size: 3-6mo outfits, 9mo sleepers!
- Shoe size: 1
- Diaper size: 2
- Teeth: none yet, but they’re almost cutting through!
- Rolling Over
- Sleeping through the night
- Sitting Up
- Tasting Baby Foods!
- Daddy’s scratchy beard
- Bath time!
- Her riding hippo
- Stella (even though Stella is not a fan
- Talking to mama
- her play mat/fish mat
- Apple Sauce and Sweet Potatoes!
- Her Carry-All…we’re working on getting her a big girl carseat.
- Nap time, unless she’s REALLY sleepy
- Not being able to see everything